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~August 30, 2008 - 2:32 AM Y

*~* "It's twilight," Edward noted. "It's the safest time for us. The easiest time. But also the saddest, in a way... the end of another day, the return of the night. Darkness is so predictable, don't you think?" *~*

*~* "I like the night," Bella replied.
"Without the dark, we'd never see the stars." *~*




Today is the fifth day of the break up...


End up today I still cannot forget about him...


I keep having the thought of "what did I do wrong to deserve this kind of pain? I love him so much and try to give him as much happiness as he wants but I didn't do it."


I keep thinking it is my fault that made him lose feelings for me...


I did not understand him enough and I keep questioning him...


I do stupid things and say hurtful words when I should not.


I do a lot of stupid things to seek his attention but end up he tell me he lose feelings for me....


Today I was at my mother's shop helping her out...


Suddenly memories of him pop into my mind again and this time I cannot take it anymore, so I tell my mother.


I thought she will comfort me but she nearly gave me a tight slap.


Then she scolded me "HE DONT EVEN CARE ABOUT YOU ALREADY! YOU KEEP THINKING ABOUT HIM DOES HE KNOW ABOUT IT? DOES HE REALLY FEEL SORRY FOR HURTING YOU? EVEN IF BOTH OF YOU GO BACK TOGETHER, HE WILL DO THE SAME THING TO YOU AGAIN THEN YOU WILL CRY MORE BECAUSE YOU WILL LOVE HIM MORE!"


I couldn't stop my tears from coming out of my eyes at that very moment because I know very clearly that he is never coming back...


He no longer cares about what happens to me.


Even if I die for him he will not feel a thing because he no longer have feelings for me...


In future I still want to be his friend but I will not know how to face him already.


Looking at a person who hurt you like never before really kills...


I no longer know what to do and my mind is always filled with memories about him...


Because of this I didn't concentrate when I was ironing clothes for my mother then I scalded my hand...


It is as painful as the time my feet got burnt but this time, Jeff is not there to care for me...


I can remember clearly that time I was at Jerlin's chalet.


Then I burnt my feet, so end up he carried me to the nearest place to take a cab to a hospital.


At that time, he really is my knight in shining armour who come for the damsel in distress.


After this break up, I realised this is only a moment of fantasy and it will never come back again...


Why things have to turn out this way?


I really don't understand...


I really put in a lot of effort trying to always make this relationship right but it didn't turn out right...


I really dont know what to do already...


I am at my limits...



*~*There are things in life that are inevitable. Though it's tough and avoiding always seems the only solution. The real truth is facing it will make it better.*~*










THE BLACK ROSE..Y

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Once, there was a black rose..
It wasn't as beautiful as the other red roses..
Even though it's the only black rose,
nobody seemed to notice it..

The black rose just stood there,
wasting all its remaining life away..

Nobody sees it..
Nobody watered it..
Even the sun wouldn't shine for it..
It was left alone in the darkness..

Slowly...
The petals fell..
The rose wither..



The delicate black rose never spoke a word..
Always trying to hide its flaws..
Always trying to blend in with the red roses..
Still..
It is always being ostracized..
Alone..
Outcast..
Invisible..

Shockingly..
People start noticing the black rose.
A bud start to grow from the stalk..
The bud grew into a new beautiful black rose.
This time, the sun shone brightly for the black rose.
Making it the most beautiful and outstanding one.
Not by the beauty from its physiques..
But from its inner self..


MOTTOY

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Art Is My Life, Designing Is My Passion, Success Is My Future, Happiness WILL Last Till My Twilight Years


THE LADYY

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Name: *-* Crystal Chan *-*
Nick: Shirayuki Mizuki, 瑞希 白雪
Age: *-* 17 *-*
Gender: *-* Female *-*
Zodiac Sign: *-* Capricorn *-*
Birthday: *-* 1st January *-*
School: *-* MacPherson Sec *-*
Occupation: *-* Student *-*
Affiliations: *-* Free Tinker *-*
Current Status: *-* Single *-*


SHE LOVESY

-Her Romeo

-Hobbies and Interests:
Chatting, Shopping, Listening To People's Troubles, Watching Anime, Day Dream, Listening To Music, Drawing, Singing, Dancing, Being Very Happy, Swimming, Sight Seeing, Happy-Go-Lucky

-Favorite Animals:
Panda, Baby Seals, Penguins, Dolphins, Killer Whale, Dogs

-Favorite Books:
Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, Breaking Dawn, Birthing House, Madly Murderous, Chicken Soup for the Teenage Soul on Love & Friendship

-Favorite Movies:
Horror Movies, Saddist Movies & Comedies
Those movies that will carve deep in my memories. As long as they are good movies I like them.

-Favorite Music:
Hip-Hop, Pop, Rap, R&B & Classical

-Favorite Shows:
Drama:
Fated To Love You (命中注定我爱你), Corner With Love (转角遇到爱), Devil Beside You (恶魔在身边), Why Why Love (换换爱), The Clue Collector (霹靂MIT), Black Sugar Macchiato (黑糖马奇朵), Hana Kimi - Japanese Version (花样少年少女)

Japanese Anime:
Chrno Crusade, Tsukuyomi Moon Phase, Maboraho, Mahoraba, Ichigi100%, Card Captor Sakura, Chobits, Kyou Kara Maou, Full Metal Alchemist, Naruto, Ouran High School Host Club, Aishiteruze Baby, Suzumiya Haruhi No Yuutsu, Ai Yori Aoshi, Magister Negi Magi Mahou Sensei Negima, Fruits Basket, Hand Maid May, Love Hina, DearS, Koi Kaze, Death Note, Tsubasa Chronicals, XXXHolic, High School Girls, School Days, Yamato Nadesico Shichihenge, Sumomo Mo Momo Mo, Gakuen Alice, Suzuka, Mermaid Melody Pichi Pichi Pitch, Shakugan No Shana, Rozen Maiden, Strawberry Panic, Inukami, Shuffle! Memories, kamichama karin, Beating Angel Dokuro-chan, Demonbane, Futakoi Alternative, Avatar The Last Air Bender, Devil May Cry, Kimikiss Pure Rouge, Rosario + Vampire, Vampire Knight, D.Gray-Man, Elfen Lied, Trinity Blood, School Days, Jigoku Shoujo, Blood+


SHE HATESY

-Boring Movies
-Boring Books
-People Who Backstabs
-People Who Breaks Promises
-People Who Lies
-People Who Acts Nice

SHE WANTSY

-Pass O'level with good grades
-Get into Laselle
-Be a sucessful fashion designer
-Learn interior designing also
-Earning large sum of money
-Go Japan, Paris, USA, Canada
-Buy a silver convertable Volvo and house
-Design my own house
-Have a long drive through coniferous forest roads
-Forever remain SFF with Bryan
-Be with him for a very long time
-Remain Happy Go Lucky Always
-Live a healthy lifestyle, Mentally Socially and Physically

HER QUOTATIONSY

-Life Is Like A Block Of Wood, Plain, Boring, Square And Down To Earth. However If You Believe In It, In Yourself, You Actually Can Achieve Something Magical, Unexpected and Unimaginable.
-Hard Work, Integrity, Enthusiasm, Perserverence, Good Luck & Determination Is The Key To Sucess And Dreams.
-There are things in life that are inevitable. Though it's tough and avoiding always seems the only solution. The real truth is facing it will make it better.
-Never Let Small Matters Bring You Down, Never Give Up Just Because You Think You Can't.
-NEVER Cherish People Who Doesn't Cherish You.
-As Time Goes By, You Learn Things That You Can Never Learn From Books Or From School.
-Work Hard To Persuit Your Own Happiness And Future.
-Never Let Anyone Stop You From Doing What's Right, What You Like or Best At.
-Only Allow Guys Similar to Edward Cullen, Or Better, To Be With You.
-Everyday, Happy Go Lucky.

A Girl Can Dream You Know?

TWILIGHT SAGAY

-So ready for this to be the end, for this to be the twilight of your life, though your life has barely started. You're willing to give up everyhting. It's not the end, it's the beginning.

-"It's twilight," Edward noted. "It's the safest time for us. The easiest time. But also the saddest, in a way... the end of another day, the return of the night. Darkness is so predictable, don't you think?" "I like the night," Bella replied. "Without the dark, we'd never see the stars."

-When You Can Live Forever, What Do You Live For?

-Nothing Will Be The Same.


ARCHIVESY

May 2008
June 2008
July 2008
August 2008
September 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
February 2009
March 2009
April 2009
May 2009
June 2009
July 2009
August 2009
September 2009

EXITSY

♪ Vampire's Rose.. ♪
♪ My Friendster Profile ♪

♀ Ai Ling ♫ Akiko
♀ Alia
♀ Alicer ♫ Yuko
♂ Aloysius ♫ Aloy
♀ Amy
♀ Angela
♂ Bryan Chung ♫ SFF!
♂ Bryan Tan
♂ Chandra
♀ Chin Gek ♫ Kizuko
♀ Geraldine
♀ Hui Juan
♂ Jason ♫ Potato
♀ Jerolyn ♫ Jelly
♀ Jia Ming
♀ Ka Khay
♀ Lenise
♂ Lester
♀ Lindsey
♀ Li Rong ♫ Leh Long
♀ Li Rong ♫ Leron
♀ Miisha
♀ Shi Ting
♀ Shu Hui
♀ Shu Yi
♀ Siew Hwee
♀ Su Yi ♫ Su Ni (Mash Potato)
♀ Vivien
♀ Yeok Hoon ♫ Yeok Yeok
♀ Yi Jie ♫ Xiao Extra



MUSICY


MusicPlaylist
Music Playlist at MixPod.com